I really hate it when people just lie to me right to my face, knowing full well that I’m in the know as far as the topic goes. Or perhaps, they just beleive I’m not that bright, in which case I’m not sure which of the two is more insulting. The disrespect shown by eBay in their handling of this particular mini-layoff toward those of us who were herded into eBay from PayPal into site operations in order to become one with the team, training our eBay counterparts to pass some sort of competancy examination they concocted for the eBay people to take, and then charged us with the responsibility of making certain they pass it, only to result in the loss of our jobs. Here, we thought our jobs were in jeopardy if we didn’t train them… I should have known better.
I’ve spent roughly nine and a half years in this stupid fucking industry, and without a doubt the lowest common denominator has been the utter lack of respect or trust given by management. From the moment they hire you right down to the moment they let you go, and for the past one hundred fourteen months I’ve put up with it all; the words and gestures, the menial tasks, and the doublespeak. I hate the fucking doublespeak. Every manage wants to be the nice guy, the one everyone likes. If they would take their heads out of their asses long enough to take a breath, they might realize that it just isn’t so.
Today, I had my meeting with the guy from human resources. I think I can safely say it truly sucked to be him. No one has ever really seen me pissed off before, and that’s actually quite a good thing. I am my father’s son and I have inherited his temper, but the underlying differences between my siblings and I is the manner in which I try to channel it. I don’t scream, I don’t lose my temper; I just let my voice get lower and lower until the sheer bassiness of it shakes the fucking room. I don’t need to raise my voice, either. I just let it get lower and harsher and even somewhat quieter. It’s not a fun thing, but it’s either that or stand up, reach over, and push the guy’s nose right through the back of his skull. I’m not a violent person by nature. Even in my martial arts training, I tended to study for katas rather than kumites… I don’t like causing pain. But when you see red, you see red. I think I was just glad my sensibility returned long enough for me to take the papers he wanted me to sign, put them in a folder unsigned, and walk out the door before the full nature of my wrath is fully realized. I got into my car, drove to Foothill, and dropped over six hundred on books as though nothing happened.
And so, as I close the chapter in my life hereforeverafter known simply as ‘eBay’, I will only say the following: I did have fun with the people I worked with. They were and are still awesome coworkers. I wish them the best of luck. I hope we all land on our feet.