Finals in less than two weeks…
This week has gone by pretty quickly. I got my math exam score back on Monday, only to see that I got a 69% on it. Fortunately, the rest of the class faired worse, and so my math instructor offered a math follow-up exam to allow some of us to regain some points by proving mastery of certain parts of the exam. I think I only missed one on the follow-up, so the others will hopefully gain me more points in the long run. Even if I only get half, I still make a B on the exam, and I know I didn’t miss that much. Then again, I didn’t think I did so poorly on the original exam, so what do I know? I’m not too worried about the finals in any of my other classes. I’m assured to grab a B in both Japanese 3 and Philosophy, a possible A or at least a high B in History. Math’s really the only one I’m stressing about right now. If I don’t pass Math with at least a C, I’ll have to take Math 105 at another college, like West Valley. And I really hate West Valley.
Today, I started my permanent shift at eBay. I really like it over PayPal’s NOC; not that I don’t miss certain aspects of working at PayPal. I really liked being able to walk over to people’s cubes and cornering them into giving me answers. The interaction between those groups and I is something that’s very essential in carrying out my responsibilities. It’s kind of cuts both ways, though; they’re about as helpful in my PayPal issues as I am to their eBay issues. I feel rather like a foreign exchange student at times, watching the flurry of activity around me but unable to really contribute anything of value without detracting from the focus of resolving the issue at hand. Eventually, I’m sure I’ll get to a point where there won’t be a problem of my participation. Tomorrow, in fact, I’ll get started on training on the job as much as possible, and handling some of the more minor issues pertinent to eBay.
The other aspect of working at eBay which has gone unmentioned since I started is the Stephanie variable to the equation. It hasn’t been much of a problem, really. At least, not as much of one as I prepared myself for. After the initial trepidation and anxiety, I realized it was all for nothing. I look at her, and there’s nothing there, emotionally, any more. We had something of a quick discussion before training on Monday afternoon, and the conversation fell flat after a few minutes of initial banter. I felt bad, because there really used to be a connection there between us, on a friendly level. Now, I’m not even sure if that’s there anymore. The responses I got on Monday afternoon before and after training was pretty clear: go away. It was probably because she was working on stuff, but eh… point is, I really don’t care. I’m here to do a job, and go home. Anything above that is irrelevant, and I can maintain my professionalism just as well as she can. Sometimes, I wonder if my being here has any effect on her, but then I just remember how it all ended, and I’m reassured that she’s just about as indifferent to it as I am now. Even more so, maybe… But it’s best to not dwell on the past and more forward.